An Eavesdropped Story

Overheard while looking at cards in the store the other day:

Couple in their 80s: How are you? I haven’t seen you in ages!

Woman around 70: I’m fine. I’m moving in two weeks. Have you heard?

Couple in their 80s: No. Where are you moving to?

Woman around 70: Oh, we’re staying in town but we’re downsizing to a much smaller place. I think we’ll be really happy once this is over and we’re settled in.

Couple in their 80s: I’m sure you will be. I’ve heard it’s a lot of work, going through everything.

Woman around 70: Oh yes. So much stuff from 40 years. But it had to go, and we’re even down to just one car and one truck. Our son finally took his motorcycles!

Couple in their 80s: We’ve had friends who downsized and they’re very happy they did.

Woman around 70: I’m already feeling better without all that stuff around me. I can’t wait to get into our new place.

Couple in their 80s: Who did you hire to move everything?

And the conversation went on in that vein, while I kept looking at cards. Then my antenna went back up when I heard the wife in the elderly couple say:

“You’re so wise to downsize. We’re thinking about doing it someday.”

Right. They’re already in their 80s. I’m thinking that line really means “We’ll let our kids worry about it after we’re gone.”

That’s not a very nice thing to do to their kids, who are clearly gonna need How to Clean Out Your Parent’s House (Without Filling Up Your Own).

Finding Solutions That Don’t Add to Clutter

One of the ways I ended up with too much clutter is that when I replaced something, I usually kept the old one “just in case.” My parents grew up during the Great Depression, so were raised with a frugal mindset that they passed on to me. Having raised a large family on one income, it often served me well (until we had to move and deal with all that clutter. See my new book for the gory details!)

Now that I live in a small house, and there are only three of us here, it’s really not a useful concept anymore. If something needs to be replaced, I’m best off doing so and then donating or pitching the original item. There is little spare room for “just in case” items.

So I was left in a quandary recently when my husband complained that one of our two little bathroom rugs had lost its grip and kept skidding when he stepped on it. The top of the rug still looked just fine, but yes, that skidding became annoying very quickly, and was also a disaster waiting to happen. We don’t need any broken legs around here.

I shopped online and found a lovely set of matching rugs from a vendor known for high quality. They really didn’t look much better than what we have, but of course they wouldn’t skid. The pair cost $60 plus shipping.

I thought about what I would do with the old rugs. They looked just fine, and one of them was. But I’d have to pitch them both. I wasn’t going to donate bathroom rugs.

The thought of pitching something that looked good (not to mention spending over $60) kept me from immediately acting on the situation. Then something occurred to me.

When I sew, I keep small squares of ribbed plastic shelf liner under the pedals of my machines so they don’t slide when I’m sewing. I vaguely remember throwing out the rest of the shelf liner after cutting pieces for each pedal. But I also remembered where I found it in the first place: the Dollar Tree.

So I ran out and picked up another roll for a whole dollar. I cut out a rectangle just a bit smaller than the width of our bathroom rug and placed it under the rug. It’s been a few weeks now and guess what? No slippage. So I saved a lot of money and don’t have to decide where to pitch those good-looking bathroom rugs.

My parents would approve.

Can You Predict Declutterism?

(I don’t know if declutterism is a word, but I just decided it should be one.)

I’m thinking about my kids and whether I could have predicted which ones would or wouldn’t become declutterers.

The messiest one is now into minimalism; go figure. The neatest one (well, let’s say the most organized) is still fairly neat. Another messy one has quite a bit of stuff in their house, but all of it is much loved and was curated to go together, so that it’s actually quite an interesting house and not messy at all. Then there is the one who is emotionally attached to everything and it must not be moved around.

They are fairly true to the way they were in childhood except for the one who’s into minimalism. That one has several small children and I think the minimalism is a reaction to the kiddie chaos. After all, it’s important to feel you have something under control when you live in chaos.

As I’ve mentioned in a few of my books, I was not a messy kid but I was very emotionally attached to my many beloved dolls, books, records, craft supplies, etc. I used all of my things and some showed the wear (I prefer to think of those items as looking well-loved.) I am certainly not a minimalist and was forced into declutterism out of necessity. I never would have predicted that I would someday live with a minimum of stuff. But then I didn’t know I was going to end up in a small house. (That life event was precipitated by another life event as explained in my latest book, Memoirs of a Downsized Declutterer.)

Do your childhood clutter habits show up in how you live today, or have you changed completely?