Downsize: Living Large in a Small House by Sheri Koones

Click photo for more info

Author Sheri Koones downsized from a nearly 7,000 square foot house to 1,400 square feet when she and her husband became empty-nesters. So she has personal experience with downsizing, and brings that knowledge to this book.

It’s packed with photos of a variety of houses, some small, but others not so small at 1,800-2,000 square feet. (Perhaps the book’s subtitle should have been “Living Large in a Smaller House.”)  Nevertheless, this book offers all sorts of inspiration for those who need or simply want to downsize their living situation.

One very useful aspect of this book is that it includes some homes with separate living space for an adult child or an elderly parent. That’s a common situation these days but you don’t often see it addressed along with downsizing.

Many of the homes are new construction, which won’t be affordable for many people who are downsizing for financial reasons. But the color photos of the interiors offer plenty of inspiration for anyone who is considering furniture arrangements, use of artwork without going overboard, and how to put your personal mark on a home without filling it with clutter.

The author notes that she and some others highlighted in the book went through several purges of belongings before finally settling down in their new, smaller home. Nice to know we weren’t the only ones!

Taking Minimalism Too Far

While everyone can benefit from an uncluttered home, I have to question this woman’s decluttering effort. Scroll down to the photo of the child’s room with just a few items on the shelves. There’s hardly anything there for the poor child to play with!

It’s one thing for the woman to pare down her own possessions, but making her child live a minimalist lifestyle is unfair. Kids learn so much from books and toys; in a world where smartphones are sucking up their free time, they need plenty of good books and high-quality toys to stimulate their brains.

Since they outgrow these items quickly, an astute parent will allow them to own a wide variety of books and toys that can regularly be thinned out as they are outgrown. This will limit clutter while allowing their children to develop properly, feeding their brains and growing their imaginations.

Minimalism is fine for adults without children, but those with children need to rethink the concept, especially when it comes to their children’s bedrooms.

Tiny House Living in Retirement

I recently discovered a new book about tiny houses that’s packed with photos and interesting information from people who live in tiny houses; some of them even built their own tiny houses.

Now, while I don’t think a tiny house is for me (we use our basement almost every day for our work and our hobbies), I can see how well the concept works for some people. In the new book Tiny House Living: Ideas for Building & Living Well in Less than 400 Square Feet, author Ryan Mitchell shares the stories of a variety of tiny house residents.

My favorite is that of Kathy, a retiree whose son began building her a tiny house without her knowledge (“He knew if he told her ahead of time it would be a much harder sell, so he waited until it was almost done to show her.”) Kathy now lives in the tiny house with her husband, and has found that the tiny house has made some big positive changes in her life:

She can do all that she needs to do in her home, without a mortgage and with very low bills. Her power bill tops out at $25 a month and water is about $12—not because she uses that much, but because that’s the minimum charge to keep the service on….Since she is retired, it is very important to keep her living expenses low and it means that she can do much more, like visit her grandchildren more, go out to eat with her friends more, focus on her hobbies and simply not have to worry about the bills as much…..For the first time she has had the money and the time to visit her grandson for his birthday….

So many Baby Boomers don’t have big pensions waiting for them and were unable to save up much for retirement; a tiny house might be one answer to living successfully in retirement on only Social Security and some modest savings. If that sounds like you or someone you know, you should check out this book!

In the story about Kathy, she says that her friends with large houses are beginning to wish they had smaller homes to care for and more free time like Kathy does. But she says something holds them back:

“It’s because they don’t know what to do with all their stuff that they spent their whole lives trying to pay for. They are so inclined to having stuff that it’s scary for them to think of paring down.”

To Kathy’s friends, I say “Downsize, people, downsize! Lose the clutter and gain your freedom!”

One more thing: in most tiny houses, the sleeping area is always up in a loft. Who wants to risk falling down that tiny loft ladder in the middle of the night when they need a bathroom? But Kathy’s tiny house has a futon in the living area that turns into a bed, so she doesn’t climb up into a loft to sleep. Smart!

How to Divide an Estate Fairly Between Heirs

The challenge of dividing belongings (especially valuables) is that whether they’re worth more in cash, memories or both, many items are often wanted by more than one person.

In an ideal world, a parent already gave items to those they wanted to have them or made a list of items going to specific people, along with an explanation of why they made the choices they did. But that doesn’t usually happen. What’s more common is when foggy elderly people verbally promise one item to more than one person, resulting in conflict between heirs, sooner or later.

If you’re dealing with a living estate and want to eliminate future conflicts, you may be tempted to ask your parent to assign items to their heirs now and explain their choices. But that might be too much pressure for them, or they may no longer be mentally capable of doing so.

Whether it’s a living or inherited estate, when dividing your parent’s belongings, you’ll need to at least try to prevent fights among heirs.  While it’s not always possible to be perfectly fair, everyone should try to keep everything above board and to aim for fairness.

Here are 14 methods for dividing estates that have worked for other families. Choose whichever ones fit your situation best:

You Bought It, You Take It Back

Let everyone take back anything they gave to your parent. This includes birthday, anniversary and holiday gifts, plus anything they made for them. If they don’t want it back, it becomes part of the estate that others may want, or it can later be sold.

Take Turns

Heirs take turns choosing one item each until everyone has at least a few things they want. Order of choice can be based on birth order, by drawing straws or by throwing dice. This works especially well if the estate contains items that have more sentimental value than monetary value.

Take a Chance

Each time two or more heirs want an item, settle it by drawing cards (high card wins) or by throwing dice (highest total wins).

(Discover 11 more methods in my book, How to Clean Out Your Parents’ House (Without Filling Up Your Own), just 99 cents right now.)

cover-try-D-01-e1409707662322-2